Parents who are engaged in the divorce process should take a few moments to view the video released by the Connecticut Judicial Branch called “Putting Children First.” The video features Superior Court Judge Elaine Gordon, who handled custody disputes as an attorney and now hears those difficult cases as a judge. Some of the statistics reported in the video may be shocking.

The video is available on DVD by calling the External Affairs Division at 860-757-2270.

Watch: Putting Children First
(This link will take you to the Judicial Branch website. Click on the link for the video and it will open on your computer screen in a media player such as Windows Media Player, which you must have installed on your system).

To avoid such disputes, it is important to have your divorce lawyer draft a visitation agreement that devotes specific language to which parent will have the children during specific holidays and birthdays. It is prudent to submit such an agreement to the court early in a divorce proceeding so that there are no issues while the parties are negotiating a final divorce settlement. It goes without saying that all final divorce agreements should contain specific visitation language with respect to holidays and birthdays.

It is important to avoid ambiguities in visitation agreements. For example, “father shall have visitation with the minor children on Thanksgiving in odd numbered years” leaves room for interpretation and thus potential dispute. What time does this visitation begin and end? Which parent will provide the transportation? Does Thanksgiving include an overnight or full weekend visitation? Taking the time to specifically address these issues in advance will save a lot of grief later.

Most people only address the “major” holidays (such as Thanksgiving, Chanukah and Christmas) but fail to consider holidays such as Fourth of July and Labor Day. I suggest looking at a calendar to decide which holidays may expand a weekend visitation (such as Memorial Day) or which may provide an extra day of visitation due to the children being home from school. Halloween may expand the length of a visitation period into evening hours.

Finally, I have seen several otherwise well-drafted visitation agreements that completely ignore the birthdays of the parents and children. It is important to consider how parents will handle dividing time with the children on these important days.

Remember, a well-drafted visitation agreement will save you a lot of frustration (and the cost of additional court time). Be sure to give it careful thought.

[Thanks to Orange County Divorce Lawyer Blog for the inspiration]